Adventures in Learning: Public Finance

The dull glow of my laptop screen reflected off my eyeballs as stared indifferently at the slides for today’s chapter. Honestly, it was a miracle I managed to stay fully awake. I always doze off during the Friday lectures.

Class begun at noon. It was six after and Professor Budweiser was still not here. He taught most of economics courses at BU. A strange intense man of about five foot four, his appearance reminded me of the fierce Dwarves from The Lord of the Ring movies.

Ugh, typical. Late again.

This guy must have been tenured. For those of you who are unfamiliar, being a tenured professor is like getting the invincibility cheat-code in GTA. It would take nothing short of a felony before the university even considers firing a tenured professor.

Dr. Budweiser rushed in the classroom like a whirlwind. Behind his computer monitor I could hear him whispering a string of muted curses: Shit shit shit shit! Finally, after collecting his composure he addressed the class:

“Alright class. I’m in some deep shit and I need your help. The dean wants me to speculate what effect introducing a new tax would have on the local economy. He needs an answer TODAY. Now we can’t screw around here OKAY? We just gotta get it done.”

 Whoa whoa. There is no “we” buddy. The Dean asked you. Besides I’m not an economics major.

Clearly the other six students were equally confused because no one said anything. Professor Budweiser must have been desperate because then he said the most compelling thing I’ve ever heard:

“Alright guys I’m going to level with you – I can’t baffle them with bullshit and I sure as hell can’t dazzle them with brilliance. So we just gotta go ahead and do the work! OKAY?”

Suddenly the one prodigy economics major raised his hand. Together him and professor B spent the entire class period finding an answer for the dean. It was beautiful.

Moral of the story? If you can’t baffle them with bullshit nor dazzle them with brilliance just go ahead and do the work! OKAY? – Barry


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