Interacting with random Bloomsburg Townees is always an interesting experience. These are moments typically occur in a few seconds, but they are definitely worth sharing.
Overcast sluggishly drifted in front the morning sunshine blanketing Market Street in a cool shadow. Usually I love the sun, but the sweat soaked clothes sagging on my body made me disagreeable today. I spontaneously decided to go for a run on one of the hottest mornings in July – lucky me. Approaching the fountain at the intersection of Market Street and Main I happened upon an interesting scene:
A short husky eleven year boy wearing a red baseball cap exited PNC bank with his mother just when I rounded the corner. The pair were about to cross Main street when suddenly the kid breaks away panicking.
Ooo this is getting interesting.
Mom: “Shane! Get back here!” She did not hide the annoyance in her voice. Clearly she was done with Shane’s bullshit.
Shane: “MOM! NO! I’M NOT JAYWALKING!!” he squealed back.
You tell her Shane! Jaywalking is a crime!
Mom notices me observing this argument unfold while I conveniently walk by supeerrr slow like. Goddamn it! her eyebrow spasms seem to shout. She recoups a scrap of patience and tries again.
Mom: “Shane, honeyyyy, please come her so we can cross the street”
You don’t have to pretend for me lady.
Shane defensively holds his current position, not budging an inch.
Shane: “BUT MOM! THERE’S A METER MAID! I DON’T WANT TO GET ARRESTED FOR JAYWALKING!!!!!”
Umm first of all show some respect for a parking enforcement officer… haha nah she’s totally a meter maid.
Mom: “Shane! She isn’t going to arrest us! Get over here!”
Not waiting for a response the full fury of Mom’s rage is uncaged as she quickly paces over and snatches her son by his plump little wrist.
Oh shit! You’re going to it now little man!
Attempting to be a mature young adult I poorly restrain my urge to grin and cackle. Mom notices, flashing me an icy death glare as a warning. Time for a light jog.
Boy I’m glad I do not have kids – Barry